I spent the first 3 days of last week at TechCrunch50.  I’ve been torn about what to write about the event.  I don’t really want to talk about the logistics…I’m going to trust that Arrington and Co will improve things next year.  I don’t really want to talk about any specific startups, because very few blew my mind.  But that helped me finally figure out what I wanted to talk about: the basics for marketing your startup.

You may ask why I think I’m qualified to post on this.  I certainly don’t have the experience starting and running a startup that Calcinas, X, or X have.  But that’s just it: these folks have great internal insights, but they also have the Curse of Knowledge; They don’t look at startups from an outsider’s perspective.  I think I do, for the most part.  In my experience, here’s the elements that many TechCrunch50 startups were missing that resulted in me leaving with no knowledge of what they’re about

1. Have a name I will remember.

There seems to be a new trend in naming Web 2.0 companies.  Gone is (occasionally frustrating) dropped and/or added vowel of Flickr, Zooomr, Tumblr.  The new trend seems to be taking a real word and spelling part of it out in a weird, extended phonetic way.  I won’t use any real examples from TechCrunch50…my goal isn’t to embarass people, just to help.  These fake names pretty accurately represent what I saw at the conference: hangowwwwt, wikeeficayshun, sooperpooper.

The issue here is that if I actually figure out what “hangowwwwt” is supposed to be (“hangout”), I will probably go home and type “www.hangout.com” into my (Flock) browser.  Maybe I will remember a bit and type in “www.hangowt.com”, but that’ll still be wrong.

Don’t name your startup something I’m unlikely to remember and unable to spell!

Good names are both memorable, descriptive, and easy to spell.  Some real examples from TechCrunch50: Legalicious, Flypaper (great logo too), Bluehaze, Musicshake, Truecar, and Goplanit.  It’s great if it makes sense like Goplanit, but it’s also OK if it’s somewhat nonsensical, as long as it is memorable and evokes an emotion.  My favorite example of all time is RadioHead.  Two words that I already have in my vocabulary, combined in an intriguing way.  Eventually, it loses meaning as two words, and now my brain holds three words: Radio, Head, and Radiohead.  Brilliant.

2. Have a reason for people to come to your booth.

This one is a sad fact of conferences like this: there’s a lot of shit to look at…why should I come to your booth?  You have to work your marketing muscle in any way you can to get me there.  This could be as simple as having a tagline that catches my interest (“Share status updates with your co-workers” – Yammer, TechCrunch50 winner).  Or, you can go a more primal route: fill my wants and needs.  Zivity had cell phone chargers.  Gazaro had booth babes  (and they worked rather hard).  Joongel had a big sign that said “We Have Chocolate”.  The guy from Kangapole juggled.

3. Use pertinent examples.

This one’s pretty simple.  Cater to your audience.  If you have something map-related, show the location of the party later that night.  If Joss Whedon is coming by later, have Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog on the screen.  Not that he noticed.

Your audience is also not homogenous.  TechCrunch50 was a mix of investors, exhibitors, press and others.  You don’t want to give me the same pitch as an investor.  Instead, take a glance as my badge and figure out why I’m here.  If neccessary, ask me what I do online!  I can’t count how many startups pitched me on stuff that, while useful to someone else, I will NEVER use.  If they had asked before speaking they either could have saved some time or catered their pitch towards my needs.

4. Make it easy for me.

This is more of a note for those who are just forming their startup, but it’s very important.  It’s great that you have a social network/media site/news site for people who like to go to conferences.  You certainly have found a demographic.  Here’s the issue:  these people already have social networks.  If they’re going to conferences they’re probably busy.  And you’re asking them to set up a new account, add all their information, start uploading photos and making friends and interacting?  Trust me, they’re not going to spend the time.

Make sure when you create (and hell, as you evolve) that you are helpful and not work.  If I feel like it is going to be exhasting for me (someone who works in the Web 2.0 business) to try this network, you’re unlikely to get normal folks.  Make sure that along with your niche and demographic, you solve a pain point.

If you accomplish the above 4, you’ve got my attention.  Make the most of it.